Wednesday, May 28, 2008

lets just say

That diarrhea without a colon is a trrriiipp.
I know I should do what I said I was going to and that is keep a better ongoing log of the bullcrap I get to go through. I've just been so exhausted. (ME?!? too exhausted to talk? pshaw you say. But yes! it is truth)
Either way, it's wednesday. I started that first chemo thursday of last week. I would expect to not be so crappy still almost a week out. And let me tell you, besides being a little tired, I probably would be just about okay, if it weren't for these damn cramps! fffuuuuccckkk....
So, the only thing I could think to pass the time since thursday, has been sleep. I really did want to go out and enjoy the really great weather this weekend, or get errands done this week (erg, damned expired drivers license) but honestly, all i've done is stayed inside and slept on and off.
I barely talked to anyone but who was in front of me, no answering phone. infrequent texts (and that is probably the rarest thing for me. for those of you who know me.)
I had lots of people seeing if I wanted to go out to things (movies, parties, bbq, etc). Which I supposed is very nice, but all I wanted to do was whole up in my house. where my bed and bathroom are in close proximity.
I have an awesomely amazing roommate who understands this, and doesn't question random naps at random times. all the time.

And an amazing best friend

who not only understands random naps...very much encourages them. which is how scenes like this occur:

But, I promise you, even a visit like this means alot to me. I guess lots of people around me want to know what they can do, and if i need anything. And I'd love to say get me this, and i need that. But ultimately, I suppose its more about wanting to not have to be "up" all the time. I like to veg. Come veg with me. It's super easy, I'll give you a crash course (ba-dum-dum-ching!)

Anywho, good friends are awesome.

Chemo, is not awesome.

Rashes and acne caused by chemo when you've never had a skin problem in your life. SUPER not awesome.

But so it goes...

Oh, and it's now 2 days before my birthday. Yay. (note super-enthusiasm in there. somewhere).

I've never not cared about an upcoming birthday as much as this one. It'd be nice to be able to eat and feel normal on my birthday though. just a small bday wish.

Well...that bed, and the ever alluring sleep beckons me yet again. Sweet dreams internetland.

1 comment:

  1. awwww I'm sorry you're having a tough time. Ativan was my chemo friend for naps :) Hang in there!!!