I know i know i know....i'mma bad bad blogger.
I've been on a itty bitty break. Sorta forgot bout writing. No real good reason. Other than maybe, trying to get back to living.
It's cool seeing all the comments on here though. Sometimes people comment and I realize I have no way to answer em back. Which is sorta sad.
I want you guys all to know I do read every comment and I'm so honored, flattered, touched, surprised, embarrassed, and humbled that anyone even reads what I have to say.
It was really cool that I got a comment on my last entry from a nurse that I had at Cleveland Clinic in September for my surgery. It feels awesome that they not only remember me, but actually got online to see how I was doing.
And for that...to anyone that I've come across in this mad journey that is cancer...I'm doing well. I think about lots of the nurses and fellows and doctors I've come in contact with often. Believe it or not.
I remember one nurse (or nurse aid?) at cleveland clinic who sat in my room when my mom was out doing errands, and talked to me for the longest time about her sister, and their quest to decorate her sisters house by going to every yard sale they could find.
And I remember the Radiation Therapist who would buy at least 2 of my "CANCER SUCKS" bracelets every time she saw me (and seeing as I was there mon-fri for five weeks straight...that's alot of bracelets). She single-handedly outfitted almost every person working in radiation and the CT Scan dept.
And I remember the Stoma nurse from Cleveland emailing me months after surgery to see how I was doing, and to say how great my stoma looked.
And not even just in the medical area. From the first day I told people at work what was going on, the person that runs the cafe in my job decided there wasn't alot he could do to help me, but the one thing he could do was feed me for free the entire time I was in treatment. I didn't even realize til I came back from surgery and having not worked for two months how much of a help this was to me.
A friend who I didn't even know for too long, or too well at the time found out what was going on and singlehandedly organized, and executed an amazing classical concert as a fundraiser for me in a city that I had never lived or visited, on a school campus which I never attended, nor had any connection to.
And the Radiation Doctor who ended up leaving to a new hospital right on my last day of radiation, but made sure she was the one who saw me on my final day, and then gave me her personal cell phone number in case I had any problems later on.
A nurse that my mom works with, but whom I've never met decided her family and her would not give each other presents this christmas, but instead take money they would have bought presents with, and donated it to my fundraising.
There were so many people I crossed paths with that made the experience just a bit more bearable, and helped me continue to feel like a person rather than a number or a disease. This teeny tiny blog entry doesn't touch on even half. I wish I could detail out for you all how many amazing things that have happened due to such an awful diagnosis.
I felt I needed to take a sec to reflect on some of the more positive notes and all the great people I'm lucky enough to have in my life. Since I'm not in the greatest of moods right now, and my next entry will probably be a wwwwwhhhoooooollllleeee lot more negative.
but first...sleep is an order.